Megan Cohen is an adoption and assisted reproductive technology attorney. She is the owner of Family Formation Law Offices in Lafayette, California representing birth parents, adopting parents, intended parents, surrogates, and gamete donors. She serves on the board of the birthmother-focused On Your Feet Foundation of Northern California. She is also a birth mother. Vist her website www.helpwithadoption.com.
Each state in the United States and each province in Canada has a special department which deals with the affairs of children, youth and families, including child adoption. Some counties have a similar department. These departments go by many different names, and may be a part of the state's department of social services or human services. They provide services, case management, and permanency planning for children who wait in foster care. Some also approve families for adoption.
3. PROFESSIONAL LICENSING AND CONSUMER RATING – Check if they are licensed in your state. You can also look at www.adoptionattorneys.org which lists attorneys who have been vetted by the American Academy of Adoption Attorneys and have a minimum amount of related adoption experience. Find a local adoptive parent group and talk to adoptive parents about whom they used and if they were satisfied with the legal services they received.
Personalized Service – For many parents, especially those who work with adoption agencies, legal challenges are only half the battle. This is why it becomes critical to work with professionals who take the time to personally understand your situation, needs, and goals and who are committed to advocating on your behalf at all stages of the process. Our attorneys place an emphasis on personalized service and support, and draw from not only our legal experience with adoptions, but also our understanding of this major life event. Clients who work with us receive the personalized service they deserve.
Adoption is one of the most selfless ways to grow a family and provide a child with a loving home. Because it is also a legal endeavor subject to numerous regulations, paperwork, requirements, and proceedings, however, adoption can be a challenging process to navigate. With the assistance of proven family law attorneys like those at Coker, Robb & Cannon, Family Lawyers, families can gain the support of caring and compassionate advocates who have the experience, resources, and determination needed to make their adoptions dreams a reality.
You need to have a lawyer. You can't involuntarily reliquish. Relinquish means your are voluntarily giving up the child. Both parents have to voluntarily relinquish or have involuntary TPR done by a judge in court. The birthparents rights have to be terminated by a judge before you can begin the process to adopt. Usually an adoption agency handles the TPR signing. With an independent adoption, you have to have an attorney. First they will locate the birthmom & have her sign consent. Then they will attempt to locate the birthfather. If they don't know the whereabouts of the birthparents, they will have to make some kind of attempt to locate them. Usually it means sending a certified letter to the last known address, they can contact motor vehicles for address on a driver's license, and/or put a notice in newspapers in the areas where the birthparents might be living. If no one comes forward, the judge will usually TPR the parents based on abandonment and then you can adopt. The judge will need a homestudy since you are adopting a child who is not a relative of yours.

Actually from what I gather it is quite easy [sometimes] to adopt and a birthparent never even know. This is particularly true with birth fathers. In our adoption case (with my now adopted son) the absent birth parent was willing to sign and so it was quite easy. I have heard of many cases though in my research down the adoption path where the adoptive parents did searches with the OAG, DMV (as mentioned), used paid internet investigator searches, and even hired PI's then presented the evidence to the court and had the TPR signed. The truth is that none of those routes yield astounding results necessarily. I don't agree that the birth parents (the fathers in particular because these are the ones that it usually happens to) are being treated fairly but it does happen. Hmm, I guess they aren't really being treated badly they are just not being found. Maybe they don't even know? And, of course the cases I'm aware of are dealing primarily with step-adoption because this is what I'm familiar with being that it was my situation. Judges are far more leniant in these cases I imagine because at least one biological parent is present. I don't know for sure but it would be my guess.
A child is not an asset like a house that gets willed to whoever you choose. In these situations, a court and/or child services will protect the child's rights and well being, if there are no legal guardians. If the child's mother has died, you are still one of the two legal guardians. If your mother becomes the second, that doesn't mean you stop being a legal guardian. If your mother then dies, you are still a legal guardian. The two slots do not have to be filled, one is enough. If you are stripped from your parental rights, your mother adopts, then dies, then the court will decide. If she wills that you again become a legal guardian, that does not undo the stripping of your rights.
You should get family law counsel to draft and get completed an affidavit of relinquishment of parental rights by the mother. Your attorney then will file a petition for termination and adoption to get her rights terminated, file motions and orders for riminal background checks and home study Your attorney needs to schedule a trial date. Amended birth record paperwork is done. An attorney under the facts described should be able to do your case in range of $2,500 to $3,500. Court costs are filing fee, social study, criminal background check and Vital Statistics birth record amendment. A termination-adoption needs to be done correctly for the child's sake.
Many adoption attorneys have flat fee services for simple issues like document drafting, review, and filing. For more complex issues like talking to an adoptions agency or going to court, most lawyers charge an hourly rate. Rates will vary depending on the complexity of your issue and where in the country you live, so negotiate a rate up front with your attorney to avoid costly surprises.
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