From your post, it sounds like you want to do a private adoption without the birthparents involvement. Unfortunately, it's not possible to go around the birthparents' rights. They have to be notified of your intention to adopt & you have to have their consent. And like I said, if you want to go the "I can't find them" route, it has to be an honest "I hired a private investigator and here is everything we've done" kind of situation. You have to convince a judge (who doesn't terminate parental rights on a whim) that you did everything humanly possible to contact that birthmom
We talked with Widrig Law PLLC about using lawyers during the process, and they explained, “Many adoption attorneys will offer a flat fee service. The fee may include document drafting, reviewing, and filing. When the issues are more complex, attorneys will charge by the hour. The rates will vary depending on the complexity of your issue and also based upon the country in which you’re located. You should negotiate the rate up front to avoid any adverse issues later.”
There are such a HUGE number of dads out there that aren't really the bio dad as it is (and fully believe that they are). I read as many as a million or so the other day in an article. It's craziness. The whole issue and all of these paternity issues suck bad for dads all the way around. I think there should be mandatory testing on birth day at the hospital to prove they are the bio dad in the first place. It would clear up so many paternity, adoption, child support, etc... issues.
The Interstate Compact on the Placement of Children (ICPC) applies in any adoption when a baby is going to cross state lines. How long an adoptive family stays in the state of birth after the birth is entirely dependent on how quickly ICPC clears them to leave the state. Travel and lodging can be a very expensive aspect of an interstate adoption. An experienced adoption attorney should be able to get clearance within 3 to 5 business days after the birth mother has signed her consent paperwork.
I think in PA it is 18 but I will check into it. I'm very open with her and she could see her birth mother now if she wanted to and we could actually locate her. She met her three siblings last year and now keeps in touch with them. My adopted son (now 20 years old) has no interest in meeting with his bio mom or siblings but I've always been open with him and left him know it was an option. Adoption attorneys or adoption law firms are best for prospective birth mothers who have already identified an adoptive family and who feel they don’t need much adoption counseling and support. It is important to carefully consider the resources and services you’d like to have available before choosing an adoption attorney as your adoption professional.
So when exploring ways of controlling the cost of an adoption, one has to ask if all of these lawyers are really necessary. I am told that there is no legal requirement to seek legal representation. A quick search of the internet will try to convince you that there is but the majority of these websites are owned by attorneys. Of course, the laws differ in each state and so it is incumbent upon those involved to ensure that they are aware of their particular state laws and are in compliance with them.